How people sabotage themselves and get in the way of what they (supposedly) want… Part II

In an earlier post, I’d skimmed over the ways people sabotage themselves when trying to find someone to settle down with. The same is often true for one’s career as well, though I’ll save that for some other time.

Now, I know from experience what that’s like, because that was me in my twenties. I went a long stretch were I was constantly single and didn’t want to be. At least, that’s what I’d tell my friends. It’s what I thought I wanted …

Looking back now, I’m not so sure. In all honesty, I don’t think I wanted my life to change, even though I wasn’t that happy with it. New relationships can be stressful. People who are accustomed to being single can find it hard to adjust to taking some near-stranger’s feelings or wishes into account. As a singleton, you don’t worry about if your date is going to get along with your friends, or can’t stand spicy food, or prefers staying in on weeknights.

Many of my currently single friends crave steady companionship, and yet …. how willing are they, really, to make room in their lives for an entirely new person with their own wants, needs, habits and interests?

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